What Men Find Irresistible in a Female Tango Dancer
While Dancing the Tango you have a chance to practice balancing the masculine and feminine aspects of yourself, for example: in receptivity and intention, in expressing and listening, in stillness and confidence. The beauty of dancing Tango, like no other dance, blurs the distinction of who is "lead" or "follow" and merges the two.
1. Leaders Love Women Who Are Present
When a follow is "present" in the dance s/he is aware of moving from within her body. The flow of her breath and is engaged in awareness of how she revolves from her bodily axis centers. (present means in many different ways from physical body awareness of how you carry yourself, the engagement of your axis centers, to breathing with your movement which allows the energy to flow,) When a follow is present it can be felt or sensed on energetic level by the lead. When both the lead and follow are centered in their own body and present to self and the other, they walk off the floor thinking, "Wow! That was a great dance!" Being present to oneself ignites a harmonious energetic connection.
Here are some ideas and tools to help you connect to your energetic presence:
- Imagine your own axis are like that of an accordion or bandoneon, an instrument which breaths and stretches but never collapses. By simply engaging in awareness of your two centers your weight naturally distributes forward, over the big toes of your feet, grounding you and creating a feeling of being more present.
- Another metaphor that may help you is to imagine you are a cup of water, responsive and fluid. Imagining you possess the qualities and energy of water adds both presence and sensuality to your dance experience.
2. Leaders Love Women Who Are in Tune and Listen Through Their Whole Body
Tango is a language of nuance and within the nuance is the magic. Knowing how to respond to the nuances of the lead—with nuance—makes a follow irresistible. To listen and respond well requires a relaxed, connected readiness inside the body, a state of heightened awareness free of tension.
Listening well requires letting go of our own agenda and being patiently open to the other's intention; embodying both inner stillness and being ready at the same time.
Sometimes the leader will pause as he waits for the music or inspiration to inspire him; this pause is an invitation for the follower to dance subtly in place as she waits and listens.
3. Women Who Express Themselves
Generous leads usually encourage their follow to ‘’speak’’ during a pause, to finish the musical phrase with embellishments and punctuation. This interchange of give and take establishes a dialogue in Tango, rather then one way street conversation. (Learn some simple embellishments and principals when and how to use them to enhance the conversation and musicality in appropriate times.)
4. Women Who Are Balanced and in Control of Their Movement
When you are in tune with your own body's movement and the action necessary to get from one step to the next your following skills increase.
To help yourself learn exactly where in your body a movement begins and ends:
- enroll in Ladies Technique classes
- or purchase my DVD: Embellishments & Technique for Women, the Art of Argentine Tango to learn technique, embellishments, proper ways to balance.
Remember! The lead in a dance is not a pole to hang on for balance! Being present and knowing techniques of movement helps you to be a light and proactive follower, allowing the leader to drive you with finesse, like a Ferrari, instead of with brute muscle like a truck!
5. Women Who Give 100% to The Dance
There is a saying that apples to Tango ‘’Do it with Passion or do not do it at all’'. ‘’Tango is a dance of ownership - your own love affair with music, apparel, movement and expression - and sharing that love with your partner. In this state, boundaries of leading and following melt and Tango becomes a delicious, subtle and dynamic conversation.
6. Women Who Savor the Moment
Tango is all about commitment to fullness and journey of each step of the dance not a destination.
Treat Tango as a piece of a delicious chocolate. Tasting, breathing and being present in every step of the dance.
7. Women Who Own and Connected to Their Sensuality
Tango is all about sensing and feeling, that is why the best experience you can have dancing Tango is when you partner is so good you can close your eyes and trust your leader to take you on the journey. To develop sensuality and sensing do activities that connect you to the body and sensations: walk on the sand and feel its texture, feel the breeze on your face, breathe and bathe in the sun, take time really taste the food, explore and enjoy the sensation of your own touch, feel your own movement and enjoyment of it.